Kardashian

The Million Dollar Yeti

Khloe Kardashian defies all logic when it comes to the physical construction of a normal human's body. It makes me question the evolution of present man from the neaderthal period, because clearly, she's the closest thing to a humanoid cave-dweller that I've ever had the displeasure of seeing. I'm surprised some lucky paparazzi hasn't submitted her picture to a cryptozoological society yet, specifically to prove the existence of a sasquatch. I can see the headline, "Bigfoot lives among us in the form of untalented, and possibly inbred, amazonian!"

Her marriage and love for her husband are obviously fabricated. If she had any respect for herself or her life, she would stop exploiting herself to every magazine in the country and learn to live awhile without the luxury of having everything handed to you. Khloe is the epitome of everything a sister should never be. Even though her 2 sisters are quite literally forever in her looming shadow, Khloe acts like she's afraid to do or say anything that would upset the balance of her sisters lives. Instead, she copies them. "She had a baby! So I want one too. It could get me some seriously amazing publicity."

If Khloe Kardashian were any faker, she'd be Kim. There's nothing to respect in a woman who marries for publicity, stages a wedding for photo opportunities, and talks about her struggles with infertility to get the empathy of an entire entertainment world. Quite frankly, if her and her "husband" ever were to produce their own bouncing hellspawn, that child would be doomed to be a spoiled brat right from the start; just like its mothers.